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He Ain't Heavy, He's My Uncle
He Ain't Heavy, He's My Uncle was the 5th episode in the 6th series of Only Fools And Horses, airing on the 27th January 1991 with a viewing figure of 17.2 million. This was one episode which featured Albert Trotter having a major storyline. He gets a whack in the eye by his old school rival Knock Knock on his way home and then says he was mugged by 4 people, then 5 then 6, and Albert later ends up running away from home. Will Del and co find Albert? And what will Del think when he finds out the truth about Albert's black eye? Synopsis Albert Trotter has just joined the Over 60s club and is practicing weightlifting. Del Boy compares him to Gazza. Rodney Trotter is still very depressed. He has no job anymore, he is living back at Del's flat, and he has broken up with Cassandra Trotter. Albert says when he was on the phone to her she said she wanted his cheque towards the mortgage. Rodney says he will see to it. There has been several muggings on the estate and Del wants another vehicle so Raquel Turner can drive to the shops rather than walk. Albert reckons he can handle the muggers, saying he boxed for The Navy. Del Boy rings Boycie and buys a car off him. Rodney is in dire straits as he has been out of work for a few months. He persuades Del Boy to take him on again. Rodney says he is desperate. Del agrees to take him on as his financial advisor even when Rodney asks Del to lend him money. Del's assigns him to his first job, cleaning the car. When Rodney sees it, it is covered in mud and dust. Del demands he cleans it seeing as he is now working for him again. Rodney says he used to run a computer section and his days of being Del's dogsbody are long gone. Del says he can always fire Rodney if he wants so Rodney reluctantly agrees to clean it. Meanwhile Albert is all dressed up for a night down The Nags Head to play dominoes with Marlene's mother Dora Lane and his old school enemy Knock Knock (real name never revealed). That night down the pub Del notices some skinheads stood in the corner of the pub drinking beer and thinks they could be the muggers who are hanging around the estate at night. Del's friend Ollie says he has seen them on the estate, confirming Del's suspicions. Rodney storms into the pub with dirt all over him after cleaning Del's car, which he now calls The Prattmobile. Rodney then says he is going to see Jevon. Albert and Knock Knock argue over the dominoes game and over the attentions of Dora. As Albert gets a wad of cash out, the skinheads look over and watch him doing so. A few hours later back at the flat at "Trotter Towers", Del says he has bought the new car for Raquel so she can drive to the shops instead of walk so she does not get mugged at all. Del says that it is a very dangerous world out there. Del and Raquel cuddle but touching her pregnant belly has put Del off a bit so he offers to make a cup of tea. But just as he does so, Rodney rushes into the flat in a panic. He says he was on his way back from Jevon's where he saw Albert laying injured on the ground. Rodney says Albert has been mugged by 4 people, his watch and wallet are gone and has double vision and was rushed to hospital. Del and Rodney quickly rush out, Del in his pyjamas. Del quickly rushes back in to get changed into proper clothes. The following day, Albert is on the sofa with a massive black eye and is in a state of shock. He says there were 5 muggers. Originally he said 4. Del says he will find the people what did it and they will know what a state of shock really is. Raquel warns him to not take the law into his own hands but Del says round here people sort out nasty people personally. Del says when he was about 10 years old his mum Joan Mavis Trotter had her jewellery nicked by a good looking Italian bloke who was not so good looking when his dad Reg Trotter was finished with him. Reg had found one of Joan's earrings on the back seat of this Italian bloke's car. Cassandra comes round and her and Rodney have a chat in the kitchen. She accuses him of being more like Del. Rodney gets stroppy and Cassandra storms out. A few days later, Albert is still staying indoors, frightened to leave the flat. He shows Del a photo of when he was a lad when he lived in Tobacco Road, near the docks. Albert gives a story about how he met a lion during the war and when he does an impression of the lion's roar he wets himself. Raquel takes him to change his clothes. Rodney walks in, and Del allows him to sit in Albert's armchair, where he had just wet himself. Rodney seems to wriggle around in it in discomfort, and Del is trying to hide his laughter. Rodney suggests to Del that he toughens up on Albert so to help get him back to normality. Rodney says that Del is being too soft with Albert, and that as the Trotter family are usually arguing a lot and shouting at one another, since Albert was mugged, they have stopped all the rowing and have treated Albert with kid gloves. Rodney says Albert will see that as the norm, then when they go back to the real normality, Albert will go back into shock again. When Albert returns into the living room Del says that tomorrow he wants him to go down the shop to do some shopping as he is no good the way he is because he is getting under their feet. Albert is almost in tears and goes to his bedroom. Rodney mildly berates Del saying he was a bit hard with him, in which Del retorts saying Rodney just told him to toughen up on him. Del laughs because he allowed Rodney to sit in Albert's chair, where he had wet himself. During the night, Albert does a runner, leaving Del a note. The following morning Raquel goes to take Albert his breakfast and finds he has gone and shows Del the note. Del blames Rodney, and says that he was not going to say anything to Albert until he told him to and Rodney says he just wanted Albert to get back on his feet again. They quickly leave to go round London looking for him. They try dosshouses, under bridges, The Seaman's Mission, and some of Albert's old haunts. Rodney sees an old man with some friends, and the old man is wearing similar clothing to Albert and thinking he is Albert, Rodney goes to see him, until the man turns to face Rodney, and Rodney sees he is just a lookalike. Rodney apologises then walks off. They carry on searching until it dawns on Del that Albert had just recently been talking about the area of London he was born in, down by the docks. Tobacco Road, in Bermondsey. Del and Rodney drive to the area and they see Albert stood on a jetty overlooking the area he was born in which is now posh flats. Albert says he grew up in one of the many terraced houses in the area, and says his house was somewhere round here, as the area has been redeveloped. He says they used to be called "Dockers Mansions". He says ships from all over the world used to sail into these docks, the pubs and cafes were filled with sailors from 100 countries. Timber from Canada and bananas from Jamaica used to be hoisted off the ships onto the mooring areas. Albert then says during The Blitz in 1940 the locals painted a sign on the top of a warehouse saying "Dear Adolf, you can break our homes but not our hearts". Del says the redevelopment is terrific though as he can see himself living in one of the apartments one day. They take Albert home. That evening Albert is back at the flat in Nelson Mandela House in Peckham and says he was jumped on by 6 muggers now, Knock Knock comes round to drop Albert's watch off to him and Del is suddenly angry with Albert. Why? Last week, Albert was walking home with Knock Knock and they had a fight and Knock Knock knocked him out. He never was mugged. Albert admits this and says that Knock Knock kept saying how much better he was than him so he squared up to him and Knock Knock hit him. Del is angry at Albert saying the police are out there looking for the muggers and he has also been doing so, all for nothing. Rodney comes in and says there was a punch up the end all punch ups at The Nags Head. Ollie, Del's friend and his mates attacked the skinheads that were hanging around in the pub and on the estate at night only to find they were undercover policemen. Del is aghast as he says he gave Ollie £100 to sort it out as he thought they were Albert's muggers. Rodney says when Ollie and his mates get out of hospital they will come round and see Del. Albert says they better not try anything with him around as he boxed for the navy. Del goes to lunge at Albert but Rodney restrains him. Cast Main cast *Derek "Del Boy" Trotter - David Jason *Rodney Trotter - Nicholas Lyndhurst *Albert Trotter - Buster Merryfield *Raquel Turner - Tessa Peake Jones *Boycie - John Challis *Marlene - Sue Holderness *Trigger - Roger Lloyd Pack *Mike Fisher - Kenneth MacDonald *Cassandra Trotter - Gwyneth Strong Guest cast *Ollie - Tony London *Dora Lane - Joan Geary *Knock Knock - Howard Goorney Previous Episode The Class of '62 Next Episode Three Men, a Woman, and a Baby Observations *This episode is very similar to "Wanted", 7 years earlier, in which a member of the Trotter family does a moonlight flit. In Wanted, Rodney went on the run after being accused of rape by a local lunatic Blossom, who was always accusing men of this stuff. Del, being his usual wind up merchant self pretended that the police were after Rodney so Rodney ran away and Del traipsed all over London looking for Rodney. Turned out Rodney was hiding in the boiler room at the top of Nelson Mandela House. Rodney had the last laugh when he said he has peed in the water tank, and had just allowed Del to water down his scotch with water from the tank. Blunders *The Capri Ghia's registration number is UYD 177R, yet in "If They Could See Us Now", the registration number is CCR 412W. *Del exits the lounge to answer the door to Knock Knock and after 5 seconds, he shuts the outside door leading into the hallway, then opens the door leading from the hallway to the flat and walks back into the flat with Albert's pocket watch. Del says Knock Knock had found it by the swings and had returned it, after him and Albert had a fight there last week. Surely Del would not have answered the outside door, been told all this by Knock Knock and then shut the door after 5 seconds. Locations seen *The Trotters flat (living room, kitchen) *Boycie's car showroom (office) *The Nag's Head (main bar) *Nelson Mandela House exterior (garage block, towerblock exterior) *Various locations in London (Tower Bridge, Seaman's Mission, markets, dosshouses) *Unknown streets in London *Unknown park *Tobacco Road, Bermondsey, London (dock area, apartments) Category:Only Fools And Horses Episodes. Category:1991 episodes.